Female celebrities are stupid

I know there is overabundance of reporting on stupid female celebrities. But I can't escape from stupid people, so you'll have to suffer with me. Plus I'm not going to report on "Brangelina" or Paris Hilton. Lately she's been uncharaceristically boring and shutting her trap...because it's getting stuffed by a Good Charlotte twin. As usual, Spears, Simpson, and Lohan are gracing the press with their dramatic lives. They have nothing better to do because their careers are failing.

• Jessica Simpson just got dumped by Tony Romo and is in denial. Apparently she's still not over her previous lovebird John Mayer who is now dating Jennifer Aniston. I never understood what anyone saw in grease ball Mayer...his dick must be bigger than her ex-husband's.
  
• Brit Brit is gaining weight. Hardcore. I know, it's not her fault she's cooped up in her house because she's too crazy to be let out into society.


• Lindsay Lohan thinks she's fooling everyone that she's sober. I don't mean sober from drinking, the alcohol is just the tip of the iceberg. (Check out a before & after of Lindsay sober & not).
  
• Lohan is also telling the press that her lesbian lover (Sorry, I mean "best friend") is living with her to monitor her drug use. His and/or her name is Samantha Ronson, and wherever Ronson is, coked-up lesbian sex is involved. (Click here to check out her myspace page. You may know her as producer Mark Ronson's sister, or the lesbian DJ who is causing a buzz in the Hollywood night club scene). She was also in Lohan's car last year when she crashed it into a curb. Lohan was busted last week when she started screaming at Ashley Olson in a coked-up jealous haze. Meanwhile, Lohan's mother and sister deny the lesbian relationship while doing promo for their reality show.


• Everyone is talking about Fantasia's performance on American Idol last night. Thoughts?
  

SHOCK OF THE DAY: Shania Twain and her producer/husband Robert "Mutt" Lange have split up.

FACT OF THE DAY: American Idol sucks.